| 10 April 2010
Riding The Waves of Life's Perfection is an article that eloquently describes the possibility of using time spent in jail as an intense and extended meditative experience. This first-hand account of being in confinement is infused with wise words of wisdom, humbly shared by Deva Arpana. His insights relate to finding freedom and self empowerment, reminding us of surrender and service...
Even as my remorseful flush was taking place, the witness stood beside me with a gentle hand on my shoulder. By the time we had reached our destination, a resolved calm had allow itself residence. Accepting this relaxed awareness became paramount on my priority list.
“Phew!” Pause. “Okay, here we go,” my inner voice whispered as we filed out of the truck into what has become the most intense meditation group of my life.
Jail is pretty much just the way you would imagine it to be. The surroundings are cold and lifeless, the guards are predominantly suspicious and insensitive, and fellow inmates are mostly gripped by fear and unawareness. This gives me a myriad of opportunities to practice acceptance, or to utilise the reclusive moments I have for active or passive self-inquiry. Once you cross the threshold to standing within view of the green mile and realise that your external freedom has effectively been eliminated, the inner self becomes uniquely precious. What I have seen is that how each individual deals with their newfound limitations is a direct expression of our two most defining variables: genetics and conditioning.
I have always felt blessed and fortunate to have had a loving and caring entry into life, with a warm and supportive family. This emotional and existential leg-up helped facilitate many educational and interpersonal transitions that happened to me throughout my formative years.
The downside of this gift came as I realised the vast empathic gap that existed between me and other souls that were not so fortunate. Feeling into this gulf has allowed me to understand, and help compensate for, the emotional struggles and psychological turmoil of the troubled souls I live with these days, easing into being our mutual harmony.
Another helping hand life provided was the coincidence of my first Saturn return and arriving in Pune One. Osho – wow, thank you! My uplifted gestalt in those days was seeded by an at-homeness and being absorbed into a living organism that blended syncronistically with my core beliefs and values. Without “divine surrender” (Deva Arpana) I find that what usually transpires is merely intellectual cooperation. With the act of total let-go magic happens, engendering new perspective and life.
My blind spot at this time was not realising that this union with the Mater was only one element of an evolving full functioning sentient being and not life-saving floatation device to cling to after the fear of drowning had passed. Holding an exalted perspective in the Buddhafield was not a challenge while I was there, but the tempering agent of His fourth years of silence triggered a resolve within me to walk the walk in the marketplace and turn into practice the previous nine years’ absorption of gifts. To this day, maintaining contact with our extended community has been integral in my peaceful and fruitful outlook.
The times that have seemed my darkest have been those when I have chosen a more insular lifestyle—for whatever reason I had to be reclusive at the time. Luckily, my appreciation for the humour and loving affection of like-minded souls has always kept, and still does, reopening all the lines of communication and effective networkings that are available.
I have just traversed my second Saturn return and will soon enter my fifth year with a “maximum security classification.” Astrologically, I am being asked to be of service in a more dynamic way and utilise more of the gifts I have to offer with those I associate with. It has been very rewarding for me to encourage others to find an expressive hobby here in jail, since work options have slowed down dramatically and listless convicts tend to spiral down through self-depreciation.
The limited educational activities that are available are gradually being more fully utilised, resulting in a noticeable increase of enthused, engaged men dabbling with their creative energies. More fun for everyone! The majority of convicts have either a limited education, or a history of prolonged or repeated incarcerations, or emotional and cognitive burdens. I find that the best results for sharing within these confined conditions come from Being, rather than Doing with an intended result.
Is positivity inherited? Can it be learned, thought, cultivated, civilised, nurtured, matured, or franchised, I wonder? What works for me in this monastic setting is active meditation, acceptance, and allowing what is to be. However, so many people here don’t know what works for them. Sadly, they don’t even know there are options.
Because of the wide assortment of temperaments and personality types in the people here, I have learned to not take too lightly the variety of skin thicknesses that I encounter in daily social interactions. It has become apparent to me that this melting pot of anticipating litigants is only a caustic spark away from a life-threatening situation or an unpleasant afternoon. My growing appreciation for the possibility volatility of my new environment has strengthened my resolve to maintain a new level of attentiveness regarding my actions and the quality and meaning of the words that flow out of my mouth. Osho’s allegorical story of “walking the tiger on a leash” has taken on a vibrant sense of meaning and appropriateness: as in the story, a moment of unawareness here could potentially unleash the voracity of the protagonist. This has crystallised the understanding in me of how important it is to treat all here with grace and dignity. And I must deliver this honouring with integrity and in a believable manner to both be of service to the other and to enhance my own sense of positivity. When I accomplish this, the resulting win-win is very uplifting.
I do find that there are ways to encourage my mind to be receptive to positivity. Each morning, as wakefulness first takes hold, I enter communion by thanking the Universe for another day’s opportunity for healthy evolution, and to do this with a “thy will be done” guiding emphasis. This back-seat approach allows me to be out of my own way and ride the perfection of life’s plan with as little interference as possible.
Daily, I remind myself to attempt to make my first conscious though in any interaction “I wish you happiness.” This simple intention is very powerful and affects all of my subsequent words and actions. My altered gestalt and body language also directly invites the other to presence, and this openness allows for a more genuine meeting between us. At the close of each day, a few moments’ reflection on how I could have been more real, honest, loving, and helpful provides solace and guidance for future intentions.
The most centering device is simply: remembering to remember to return to present, away from the painful distractions of future and past that my mind so tenaciously clings to.
Namaste.
The timing for publishing this article syncronistically coincides with Arpana’s 60th birthday ,on May 10th. Anyone who wants to wish him happiness can send a birthday blessing through the airwaves, or take a moment to post him a most appreciated card or letter (no gifts or anything) so he remembers the heart and soul of the Byron community is awake and thriving.
Henry Des Rosiers,
#370951
P.O. Box 567
West Kempsey NSW 2440
